Welcome To Leverrier's Black Order
by Semper Tardius
Summary: Those of Black must never allow themselves to taint those of White. Allen Walker broke the first law of his people, and as punishment he was erased. Now there is only Red, an Exorcist in Leverrier's Black Order. He buries himself down deep in order to survive this dark world, but when his mission brings up the past, he learns it is not as easy as it seems.
1. Chapter 1

**I am so sorry. I thought I could survive without doing two stories, but it seems as if I was wrong. Now I am stuck in a ****_bad _****spot. I don't know what to write for the next chapter of ****_The Tempest_****, and this is the only other story I have prepared enough to post, even though it kind of shoots down my good mood writing it. The good news is that I am getting out of the writer's block little by little. How? I write my own stories too, and write now the words are flowing for them. Any ways, I apologize for the shortness of this beginning chapter. I promise, it is the going to be the shortest chapter of the entire thing!**

**Warning: Rated M for vulgarity, crudeness, mildish gore, sexual situations, and other dark themes. **

* * *

**Chapter 1**

**The Prologue**

_Mana's POV_

I was born in a city near the coast. Londinium—as it was called—held many tall buildings, dozens of cobblestones streets, people walking about in the open. And it would rain there, in my hometown. It rained so often and so heavily that run-off would stream down like a raging torrent through the streets. If I missed any aspect of Londinium it was the rain because it represented a thousand things to me. Freedom. Normalcy. Life without despair. Simplicity. But most of all it represented my brother. He was the most precious thing in that place. Now we are a world apart. These rats of a people kidnapped me and carried me into this miserable desert where it never rains. I live in cold, dark, damp caves. Or rather I live in its vault, the "Sky Above" as these desert rats call it. To me it is merely Noahs' Ark, and it is the only place where one can see the beauty of the wasteland from afar. I am a prisoner of the Vatican, held here by force because I am a Noah. I hate it here. I hate the view, I hate not being able to stand in the rain, I hate the people. I hate everything involved with the Vatican.

I look down at the boy sleeping peacefully in my bed. I hate him too, for he is the only thing chaining me to this wretched place. But no longer does he tether me. I have a brother in Londinium who needs me more than this boy. And concerning the pathetic waif…it's not like I hold any obligation towards him. We do not even share blood.

I stand up from the chair and walk out of the room without a second look over my shoulder. It feels so easy, leaving behind the innocent child sleeping away in my bed. I briefly wonder what will become of him in the future—but then it becomes quite clear. Once the others discovered the letter relinquishing my guardianship of the boy, they would immediately give him to an orphanage. There he will either be adopted or grow into an adult at the orphanage. I believe he would fit in the latter category if his horrid personality was anything to go by. Obviously I wish nothing but the best for him: I sincerely hope that he will be adopted by a gentle and loving couple in a good, stable environment.

"It's a better life than he was born to," I say to myself. Honestly, it was the best gift I could give to him at the moment. I do not think he would accept anything else.


	2. Chapter 2

**So I figured none of you wanted such a lame, short chapter as chapter one, so I typed this up for all of you as well. Warnings for the ratings in the previous chapter.**

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**Chapter 2**

_Red's POV_

Warm blood splashed onto my face, cooling almost instantly as it flew through the air. I ignored the sensation in favor of strangling my target. No matter how hard he tried to escape, I could not allow him to break free. I knew nothing about him other than his name, position, and the way he was going to die. It was nothing personal, I held no grudge towards this stranger. Then again, it never is.

He made gurgled sounds, choking on his blood as much as he was suffocating from a lack of air. At long last his struggles began to weaken, then stop. I waited another minute longer before finally letting go of my prey. I checked his pulse and upon finding none, removed myself from his person in order to retrieve my weapon. The knife had fallen to the floor in the struggle for his life, just out of reach for either of us to use. He had tried, certainly, but I kicked it away during our violent tangle. I picked up the blade, turning around to face the dead man.

"Really, I had no idea you would be so competent," I praised. "You managed to disarm me, forced me to fight like a barbarian."

He died fighting, and I admired that. Too many people cowered before me right before I killed them. He didn't. He fought with everything he had because he knew—one of was going to die. I bowed my head to his body.

"Forgive me for taking your life," I whispered. I did not feel a shred of regret for killing this man, at least not in the way that I should. But it was a very similar feeling. I had taken yet another life, and more scarlet stained my hands. That scarlet never washes off. I accepted long ago that I had no choice in killing people, so I never regretted it. However, I do regret destroying something so precious and fiery in this world. I regret that they merely became a crimson smear upon my name. It made my name that much more cruel. _Red_. Was it even a name? It didn't matter.

The sound of footsteps alerted me to the nearing presence of my temporary (but rather consistent) partner.

"Tch, you made a fucking bloody mess again Moyashi," Kanda growled. Some may have mistaken it for disgust or disdain, but he had seen worse messes than this one. Hell, he had _made_ worse crime scenes than this. "Are you ready to go, or are you too busy pussyfooting with your own damn conscience?"

As hostile as Kanda's words were, they held truth in them; I often battled my conscience, some days worse than others. Today was a good day though.

"Did you forget, BaKanda, that I have no conscience?" I asked. It was a false bravado. Something he would easily see through. I may have a conscience, but I am emotionally deadened. It doesn't affect me the way it used to. I sheathed Crown Clown, my dagger, before stepping over the dead man's body.

"Fucking liar," Kanda muttered bitterly. "You're lucky as hell you're so good at putting on those damn faces of yours on. Otherwise I would call you on your bullshit!"

He already had called me on lying, so I didn't know what else he could call me on. I brushed off the comment and strode in the direction of the door.

"Let's go, moron, our masters are waiting for us," I announced in a falsely cheerful voice. I could sense his irritation spike.

"Since when did you become so _obedient_?" Kanda spat the word like it was poisoned. To us, it really was. My own lip twitched in a sneer even as I tried to ignore his provocation as well. For us, arguing was as easy as breathing. He brought out the rebellious child I used to be. Kept alive the parts of me that managed to survive becoming an Exorcist. Lately those tiny pieces have been dying too, and it scared him. I knew it scared him deeply. We both feared the day I would lose what little fire and bite I still retained; but even now I could feel that fear slipping away into numbness. Soon I will be a true puppet, a tool for the Cardinals of the Vatican to use. It is inevitable—

"So obedient," Kanda repeated. "I bet my Cardinal will love seeing you bent over his desk, fucking you raw with—"

-then this idiot comes up with this awful, disgusting images, things I will never give into. I threw a kick back at him, careful to keep my voice low as he merely dodged it.

"Shut. _Up_." I forced the words through my teeth. And that was all we needed to say. Exorcists—personal assassins to the Cardinals—never trust one another, therefore never converse for long periods of time. Even we follow this rule.

Cardinals run the Vatican's laws and order, and they existed in a world full of power. They made half hearted alliances with one another, only to turn when their partner's back is bared to them. Of all of these monsters, Leverrier reigns supreme. No one attacks him, even if he lashed out at them first. _He_ controls the flow of the entire system with the most precious tool of all: Exorcists. He takes the most promising orphans he can gather, trains them, then allows the other Cardinals to buy us. Kanda and I are lucky; his Master (Leverrier) often looks after mine (Link). It is unlikely that we will ever have to fight each other to the death. Still, I keep a barrier between us. Even if we work together on almost every mission, I cannot allow myself to befriend him. There is no need to let a repeat of _Alma _blossom. Frankly, no one has enough moxy to pull that sort of stunt again. But if someone did...I needed to be able to gut Kanda right where he stands. And with Leverrier's whims, he may ask me to do that anyways. Kanda is a hard, near disrespectful character. One day I may be given that order and because Innocence binds me to that bastard, I will have no choice except to obey him.

That is another reason I hate Leverrier. He trained every Exorcist and the only thing preventing us from turning on our Masters is a special substance he calls _Innocence_. It is a vile substance, taking the form of ink. He uses ancient magic to force us into submission and obey our masters without resistance. In most Exorcists, it is only a small tattoo. But those who rebelled against him were given larger doses of Innocence. Kanda's entire left side of his chest is covered in the brand, his _curse_. Mine covers my entire left arm, from finger tip to shoulder. That isn't even the worst part. He promised the Cardinals we take orders only from them; the truth is, he is of a higher rank. He is the one who activated the magic. He is our true master. And we all hate him for it. Kanda and I suffer the most. Kanda more than I do, since he serves LEverrier directly. I can only curse the stars that Kanda's wretched personality turns Leverrier's perverse tendencies away, directing that man towards me. For now, though, I m safe. I am young, skinny, and in all honesty, hideous to look upon.

"Tch. Let's just leave this fucking place," Kanda retorted at last, the best come back he could come up with. I followed him, listening to the echoes of the sound of his footsteps on the stone floors. Exorcists all have colorful, but insignificant pasts. We all started out as orphans who had fallen through the cracks. I was no exception, but my past was just a little more...momentous. Out of all of my 'comrades' I was the only one who had his name stripped, erased from every nook and cranny of the Vatican. And out of the Exorcists, I was the only one to have been given the gift of a name, instead of having it bequeathed upon me at birth. Not many can recall the day they 'began', but I can. It was all thanks to one man...

_"What is your name?" asked the stranger who was handing me pieces of warm, fresh bread. He was unlike anyone else I had met in this district of mine. They would devour the bread before me instead of sharing it. Obviously this man was not used to living in this Hell. He must have been recently exiled. But...he didn't seem like an exile. If I looked at him properly, he almost seemed to glow. _

_"Don't got one," I grumbled at him, shoveling the food into my mouth. This was my first time eating it, and it tasted unlike anything I had ever eaten. And that was saying a lot since I ate whatever I could scavenge. _

_"Were you ever given a name?" I hated his tone of voice. It sounded like he was pitying me. I gave him a glare. He should be admiring me for being a survivor at my age._

_"Maybe. My ma prob'ly ga'me one." She had died a long time ago, so if she called me by a name, I hadn't heard it since then. She was a soft woman. She probably did have a name for me. I think I forgot it. It is quite easy to do when you're alone, you against the world._

_"Is that so?" the man said softly. "Then would you like to come with me? I can give you a home, food, family..."_

_"And a name too?" I could not help but ask. He looked at me in surprise before laughing. _

_"I can do that, most certainly. I promise if you come with me now, I will have thought of one for you before we arrive at my home," he promised. Then he stood up, offering his hand to me. "Will you come with me?"_

_I took his hand. I couldn't say no. My heart spoke to me for the first time that day. It told me that as long as I stood by this man, nothing bad would ever happen to me. _

* * *

_"Master Noah, you cannot take a nameless thing into the Sky Above! It is simply not done!" the priest argued. I clung tightly to the man who I now viewed as my protector, a man named Mana Walker. He was a Noah, a living god who wanted to take me with him into the caves sacred to his kind. Even I, a child raised in the darkness of the lowest district, understood the most important law of the people living in the Vatican._

_"He has no family, no name; he cannot go," the priest, an Akuma, persisted. But Mana was more obstinate._

_"Then let him have a family and a name!" he roared. Mana turned around to face the gathering crowd of worshippers and Akuma alike. His anger was tangible and frightened even me to the core. He lifted me up, onto his hip, and glared at them defiantly. _

_"I claim this boy as my son," he declared in a loud voice that echoed throughout the temple. "His name is Allen Walker, and from this day on he will live in the Sky Above with me."_

Mana took me in ten years ago, raising me as if I really were his own son. I lived in the Sky Above-Noahs' Ark- for six years. The other Noahs hated me at first, but I didn't care at the time. It was not a new experience to be hated, and they eventually warmed up to me. My time with my father was like heaven. I had a name, a family, and _love_. I was happy for the first time in my memorable existence.

Then Mana vanished, relinquishing his guardianship of me, his protection. And as the Akuma had warned me one day long before Mana left...

_"There will be repercussions for you, boy."_

The punishment I received was given to me the moment I stepped out of that sacred place, the holy adobe of the Noahs. They stripped me of my name and erased my existence from every document and every record existing in the Vatican. They left me vulnerable, ripe, susceptible for the Cardinals to take and twist. You may wonder what law I broke to receive such an extreme punishment. It is the first law of my people that I broke, the most important law that ensure the success of our society. There is only 'white' and 'black'. The ones who carry black- convicts, exiles, paupers, assassins, foreigners, and the lowest three districts of our tiered city- must never stray from their caste. Neither should the white- Cardinals, Akuma, politicians, _Noahs_- allow themselves to mingle with those beneath them. Black would taint white, and chaos would ensue, for who could have clear judgment when their hearts have been swayed by stained souls? Depending on the status of both the black and the white, a punishment is fitted. Erasure, exile, death, and exile into the Abyss. Those are the punishments given to someone who breaks the first law.

_"Kanda, why do they do this to us?" I asked the boy, in agony after being imbued with Innocence for the first time. I was confused, not understanding what was happening, or what they had done to me.. All I knew was that I was in pain. I was twelve._

_"Moron. This is the corrupt law of that bastard," he growled at me. Lavi, a witness to the history chuckled humorlessly._

_"Yes," he agreed. "Welcome to Leverrier's Black Order."_

Corrupt Law. Black Order. It's one and the same.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Red's POV

"As crimson as always, Red," Link observed as he worked though papers. I could hear the familiar sound of paper rustling against paper, and smell the thick odor of ink in the air. And there was also the coppery scent of blood lingering from Link as if he had just killed someone. It wouldn't be the first time. Before he became a Cardinal he was a Crow, the Special Forces of my people, superior to all, including the Exorcists. He only used me to send on errands or allowed Leverrier to use me if neither he nor Kanda was there to protect him. Link had no need of an Exorcist, a bodyguard. He did well enough on his own.

"I take it the assassination went well," he remarked blandly.

"Yes sir," I replied stiffly. "May I take my leave? I need to wash away this blood before I am questioned."

No one could really see the blood. Exorcist uniforms consisted of black and red for a reason. However, most people in the Vatican carried decent noses, and while most would not be able to associate the coppery scent with blood, a few could.

"I have no objections to your request. Before you leave, however, I want you to listen to a new mission for you," Link informed me. He stopped messing with his papers, pushing them to the side and closing the bottle of ink. His full attention focused on me. "It suits your area of expertise and knowledge."

I tilted my head to the side. I had very few skills or knowledge that the other Exorcists did not carry. His praise was misplaced. Or he could mean something entirely different.

"This mission was given to Leverrier by one of the Noahs. As I understand it, you lived with them for ten years. This makes you an excellent candidate to fulfill their request," Link explained. Inwardly I recoiled as if burned. The mere mention of my past set off something inside of me, a coil of snakes that suddenly reared their heads and began hissing. Leverrier had dealings with the Noahs before and made certain to keep me away from such dealings so that they would not recognize me. For him to suddenly give this mission to Link seemed suspicious. He could even be plotting my downfall in some complex, convoluted, calculating way.

"What is this mission?" I asked with a monotone, as betraying my true emotions would leave me vulnerable. Briefly I contemplated how carefully I would need to tread around the Noahs. They obviously knew of the Exorcists, but whether or not they knew the full story behind our existence was questionable. If they did, then they possibly knew of the fate that had befallen me. If not, then I was simply an old memory that passed out of their mind. Either way, it would be hard for me to face them. Too many memories existed between us. Noahs are amazing people, imbued with a _light_. It takes many different forms, but it is unique. I have noticed that they leave a mark on everything that comes into contact with them. Memories of the horrors and atrocities I have committed haunt my dreams. The Noahs—they haunt my dreams, my thoughts, my everything. The other Exorcists have long forgotten their happy memories, when they used to be good. They forget how fall they have fallen and only know that they fell. I, however, know exactly where I have fallen.

"Retrieve the Noah, Mana Walker, the Thirteenth Apostle. As I am sure you are aware of, he has been missing for three years now. The Noahs are sick of waiting for his return and want him here within a month's time."

I bowed, understanding what he meant now. I needed to either persuade Mana to return with me or kidnap him. I could not allow him to learn of my identity (for even though he abandoned me, I do not think he would stand for me living as an Exorcist regardless of what he knew about them), and that limited my options. Direct confrontation would be risky, remaining in his presence long enough to persuade him would only make that grow. I would have to kidnap him, or…lure him. After all, no one knew him better than I did. I certainly could lure him out.

"I understand Cardinal Link. I will carry this out as soon as possible." I straightened, turning around to leave. My master's voice stopped me.

"I don't know all of the details of your past, Red, but I think it would be wise for you to hide your identity. Allen Walker is nothing to the Noahs, simply a name that they have forgotten. You are Red now."

A flicker of disappoint crossed my heart, so brief. I didn't even know I had been harboring the hope of perhaps telling them. Harboring the hope that they would save me from this life. In the end, it didn't really matter. They could just as easily forsake me. I was broken enough already. One more drop like that would shatter everything that remained.

"I know, sir. I will remain as inconspicuous as possible."

::

Cardinals always keep their Exorcists close, letting them live in the same home as they do. Link and Leverrier owned a large dwelling with two wings. They each claimed their own wing as their home, but Kanda and I shared quarters in the main part. I was bathing in the large pool of water, contemplating what to do as I washed the blood from my skin. Kanda wasn't with me at the moment. He was likely too busy following his master around and protecting him. It left me peace and quiet, the perfect time to formulate a course of action.

Now that I had thought longer about my choices, it was clear that I could not kidnap, lure, or persuade him without some form of incentive. The first time he came here, Mana had escaped the Ark at least a dozen times, only to be caught at the gates out of the city. Then when he adopted me, the Noahs used me as an anchor to keep him here. It only worked for so long. He had something important to him in the place he came from and as long as it remained there, he would continue to return. The other Noahs knew this, but they never learned what exactly tied Mana to Londinium. He never told them. He only told…me. His one weakness was his younger brother. Neah Walker.

_If I target Neah, Mana will be willing to do anything,_ I thought to myself grimly. The thoughts and ideas filled my head, burning my conscience like acid. It would be a betrayal. I would betray Mana. Part of me argued that this was simply business. I was an Exorcist and I had orders to obey. Another part of me said that he deserved the betrayal, for he had done the same thing to me when he abandoned me. And the last part, the loudest voice of all, told me the truth. I didn't give a shit about being an Exorcist and obeying orders. I didn't care that Mana betrayed me because to me he was the man who gave me everything. He wouldn't even know that he was being betrayed. The reason I was doing this, that little voice told me, was because I wanted him to be here in the Vatican. That childish, little voice screamed for the return of the one it thought of as _father._ It had no right to wish for something like that. I had no right. I would still do it.

"I thought I was beyond such selfish desires," I muttered, hands stilling in motion as water from the sponge trickled down my back in an eerily familiar manner. It reminded me then that I was nothing except selfish, the way that warm trail ran down like blood. I killed because I wanted to survive. I never helped anyone anymore because I hated pain.

I dropped the sponge, moving towards the edge of the large pool and hoisting myself out with the grace of a killer. I walked to the familiar chair not an arm's length away, drying my scarred, ugly body before donning the clothing Leverrier provided as sleeping wear. The sad truth is that my loyalties lie only with myself. I would betray Mana over and over again, die a little more each day, if only to fulfill my own desires. Innocence and orders be damned. I always found a way around them, did I not? What I was about to do next is the most willing I have ever been to obey my master. Frankly, it frightened me. When did I become such a monster?

I exited the bathing room, into the room that was connected to it. I laid down on the simple, comfortable bed and stared blankly up at the ceiling I could not see. Sleep was almost always at the edge of my consciousness. I constantly ignored it. Nightmares plagued my sleep every time I slipped into dreams. Sometimes it was the sensation of hot blood on my hands, or the screams of faceless victims. We Exorcists live with the knowledge that we will be tormented by those we have murdered in the afterlife. The truth is that they haunt us well before then. Kanda denies having these nightmares, and every night he retires into his bed for sleep. I know he is lying, however, for there are times that he wakes up with labored breathing and spends the rest of the night lying awake. It doesn't happen very often. Just enough to know he too lives in guilt and fear.

Kanda sleeps. I never do. I doze throughout the day, whenever possible. I rest in that place of awareness, but not awakeness. And when the need to sleep finally forces me to collapse, I succumb to it for an awful, sweat drenched set of hours where nothing can wake me.

"I suppose this will be one more nightmare," I murmured to myself. I was talking about the man I had just killed. His fight had reminded me of someone I once called 'friend' in this cursed world. I frowned as that person's face appeared in my mind. There is a lesson all Exorcists learn, each gaining scars as reminders of what happens when you trust someone. I earned mine when I was foolish enough to trust Narain. I might have felt like an idiot if it hadn't been for the fact that everyone has been emotionally compromised by misplacing trust in someone. We call it the 'noose'. Already we have a rope about our neck, but this person tightens it and snaps us out of what little humanity we retain. Kanda's noose was Alma. Lenalee's was Komui. I could go on and on about the various stories, but it really no longer mattered. We each learned our lessons and will never repeat that mistake again. These people ripped away our humanity and left us with a handful of scraps. Even now these scraps are being tugged away little by little.

I suddenly heard the front door slam shut, heard the familiar stomps of Kanda. I stayed as still as possible, waiting for him to swing the room open and barge into here as he always does. Right on cue, the standoffish Exorcists barged into the room, running into the chair at the foot of my bed almost immediately.

"Fuck!" he snarled, kicking the thing clear across the room. I then felt his glare upon me. "I should have known that you wouldn't have turned on the lights."

I ignored his anger.

"I am going on a mission," I informed him. One might be curious as to why I did that, but he was my partner. If he ever needed me for something, he needed to know my availability first. Strangely enough this declaration made him calm down. He took a seat on the bed opposite of me, becoming very still. "This mission will lead me out of the Vatican.

"When are you leaving and when do you get back?" he asked gruffly.

"I leave in the morning," I replied. "I should be back in before the end of the month."

Kanda grunted in irritation. Though he would never admit it, he enjoyed the companionship we shared and would miss my company.

"Tch, don't die baka Moyashi," he told me in a sour tone. "Exorcists are hard to come by and I don't feel like escorting that bitch of a 'master' I have."

I scowled at him in the dark, glad that he could not see this change in my facial expression. I hated it when Kanda brought up the fact that Leverrier constantly requested my presence (he loved to test the extent of my obedience). I spent as much time with that bastard as Kanda did.

"Such sweet words Kanda," I told him, using my skills as an actor to make my voice low and seductive, mimicking a woman. "Will you promise to pine for my return like you always do?"

"Screw you asshole," he growled at me angrily.

"Such sweet words," I whispered in a huskier voice. He snorted to himself, throwing his uniform coat off at once and collapsing onto his bed. I had won another battle.

::

You may wonder how the people of the Vatican travel to Londinium so easily. Our caves are surrounded by the desert, and Londinium is a city along the coast so very far away. The citizens of the Vatican have adapted to cave life so well that most of them no longer have the darker flesh to protect them from the sun any longer and to walk a mile in the desert would give them burns on their light skin. The sad truth of the fact is that the Vatican solely relies on outside resources for goods and foods. And the way we travel to far away cities like Londinium is one of the few traits that have been passed down through our people from our days as desert dwellers.

A bridge across the great Abyss leads out of the Vatican, into the scorching desert heat. Not half a mile from the cave entrance rests a large oasis with a pool of cool water and greenery surrounding it. As I walk towards this wonderful place I breathe deeply. I can smell the water and abundance of life here despite the merchants' stench and the foul odors of their goods.

People pass me, their gazes lingering on my uniform. They know what an Exorcist is in terms of authority and don't stop to converse with me. The guard, though, does.

"Excuse me, Sir Exorcist, but I need to record your business in the Book," he told me with sickeningly polite intonations. He knows me by form and face; this is most certainly not my first mission outside of the desert.

"I am here on the business of the Noahs," I answer him honestly. It doesn't really matter to me, but I know that he hates it when he is continuously writing the name of my Cardinal. It certainly gets old after a while. I smile inwardly as he spluttered and eagerly wrote it down. He didn't question me as he obviously wanted to and the behavior reminded me of a child.

I stepped towards the pool of water, then into its depths. The liquid is cold, and about knee deep. It does not soak into my clothes and instead laps against me in a way that offers no resistance to my strange being. Most members of the Vatican have this way with water, able to use the ancient power within their blood to manipulate it. Water creeps up my body slowly, covering me without drenching me. My stomach clenches at the familiar sensation and my head begins to spin. For a single moment time pauses. Images fill my head, formed by Mana's words as he had described his city to me long ago. I then recall my own personal experiences from there. Sounds. Smells. Tastes. And as quickly time froze it spun forward agin. I felt as if I were spinning in circles. I stumble uncertainly, gaining my balance once more as the water fell from my body.

I sense it in the air, the smell in the wind. I am no longer at the oasis. Above me a rain laden cloud rumbles, a puddle already formed beneath my feet.

I am in Londinium now.

**I hate writing this story T T**

**The chapters are so long! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Ah, here is the next chapter. You must forgive me if I do not seem too eager to type this up. Writing this really downs my mood, and I always feel like I need to watch something goofy and funny afterwards. This fic may not seem very dark to you, but I have written at least ten different versions with my own characters before I gave up on it and I feel like I know every direction this could go in, and some of those paths are not very pretty. Anyways, I hope you enjoy it. There is a lot of internal thinking and flashbacks in this series. Sorry if you hate those.**

**Chapter 4**

_Red's POV_

The shadows have always been my friend, even before Mana found me. I lived in them for the first years of my life before we met. They hid me when the others sought after easy prey to use. It was not uncommon for a man or woman to grow so hungry that they killed any person weaker than them and ate the flesh raw. From the protection of my shadows, I had seen this more times than I would like to admit. That skill followed me into my life as an Exorcist. The rich have never learned how useful and dangerous the shades can be. They relish in having light and being able to see what is around them. They do not understand that I live in there domain. Even in Londinium, I walked in those shadows. I did not need to see them at all, for I could sense them in a similar way that I could sense people. In this way, no one noticed my strange arrival to their city.

I had formed many connections here in Londinium. You would think that I would have wanted to visit Mana here as soon as I was away from the Vatican and its laws. But my former father had made his wishes very clear on the day he abandoned me. He wanted nothing to do with the orphan he took from the streets, and since I loved him I obeyed his wishes and focused purely on my missions as the Cardinals' dog. It is not like I could ever face him either. The boy once named Allen Walker had died years ago. My love for him has faded, replaced instead but loyalty. I would do anything for him now. Anything, so long as the Innocence could not stop me from fulfilling it. Now that I have come to an impasse with my loyalty and my duty, I find myself regretting not running away to Londinium. The Vatican surely would have hunted me down and killed me, but the intricate information system I had built over the years would not exist. I would not have this cache of knowledge sitting untouched (I had requested my informants to look into Mana Walker long ago, but never found the will to actually look at it). Now I must use these things against the only person I felt undeterred loyalty towards.

I took the information, the wealth of it astounded me. The first thing I did was visit Mana's home. I climbed to the second story of the small apartment he and his brother worked hard to afford and sat outside the window on a tree branch so that I might learn more about _them_. More than once the urge arose where I wanted to meet with Mana for a moment, or tell him the reason I had been sent. But then I heard his laughter—the sound of pure joy—and could not bring myself to do it. I observed that tiny little family in a tiny little apartment all day, and the longing to meet with Neah became powerful. All thoughts of kidnapping and using him aside, there was something about him that felt wholly pure. It was as if one touch from me would stain him. I could easily understand why Mana chose Neah over me, and instead of making me loathe that young man I wanted to protect him too. Eventually I was forced to turn away from their imperfectly perfect home. They had moved within me a heart that should be dead. Rekindled the child that once lived in a similar atmosphere, when I needed to be the cold murderer who would look down upon the idea of kidnapping someone when my skills lie in the area of killing. Instead I decided to wait for Neah to leave the apartment. He worked in law enforcement as a junior detective and often worked evening patrol shifts when there were not enough people. I decided it was the perfect opportunity to approach him and learn more about him. I could then work up to a method of kidnapping him from there.

It was sad, really. Neah was seven years older than me, twenty-three. Mana was now thirty-four. They lived good lives, and both were still very young. That inexperience made it easy for me. Sure, Neah had strived despite his brother's disappearance. He bore a complete education, a decent income, and some knowledge of street smarts under his belt. But Mana had not told him anything of the Vatican, or so I assumed. He was not wary of the water as Mana was. He did not flinch at every merchant with that faint desert accent. I had followed him for nearly an hour now, and he seemed utterly unaware of my presence. I partially admire such a pure character. It meant that they were _free_.

I was standing against a brick wall when I felt Neah's presence come near mine. I stiffened slightly as he approached me without any intention of turning away.

"Excuse me for saying this, but you appear to be a very suspicious person. Do you mind removing your hood for me?" Neah asked in a polite, professional voice. I reevaluated my opinion of him slightly and obeyed his request. I had forgotten the hood was on; so used to hiding the white locks in a city full of people who wore more vibrant colors as their natural hair. He gasped for a moment, surprised, and said something I didn't quite understand. Our languages were not very different, and Mana had taught me most of the words from his homeland. But this was one of the few I did not recognize.

"I am sorry, did you not understand me?" he asked. There was a hint of concern in his voice. Then I felt him shift his focus more closely onto my face. "O-Oh, I am sorry. I did not know you were blind. I can speak more slowly if you are having trouble understand me. I can tell you are not from here at all."

"It is fine," I replied. He seemed oddly at ease with my appearance. Curiously, the dark band across my face concerned him more than my strange appearance did. And he seemed to know I did not come from here. As the law, he should be taking me in as an illegal visitor or immigrant. But he had not. Why?

"Are you sure?" Neah asked slowly. He seemed to be especially mindful of me and his tone of voice indicated that he wanted to continue a conversation with me. I was immediately suspicious of this behavior and wondered what he wanted to know. I decided it would do no harm talking like this. It could even help me gain his trust.

"Quite," I clarified. I tilted my head to the side, feigning slight interest and curiosity. "If I may ask, who are you sir?"

"I am a Junior Detective Neah Walker. I am on patrol here to make sure there are no crimes taking place in this area," he explained. He seemed a little more excited talking about his job and even a little less informal than before. I briefly wondered if he had ever encountered violence in this job, if he knew how to defend himself against harm. He exuded no killing intent in his aura. He was pure and untainted. And…he had a spark in him. Just like Mana had. Like the other Noahs had within them. The very thing that made a Noah a Noah. Mana surely knew about this and was hiding his brother from discovery.

"You seem to be deep in thought," Neah said suddenly. He shifted uneasily for a moment, as if debating whether or not he wanted to speak. At last he cleared his throat. "I will have to return to my patrol soon, but I wanted to ask you something before I do. It is the reason I have been trying to get you to talk to me. Where are you from?"

It had taken him a while to ask that question. Anyone who had seen my appearance would have immediately asked. Or rather, any normal person would have.

"I apologize for my curiosity, but your accent is familiar. My brother shares a hint of it, and I know he didn't have it before he disappeared. I know he must have lived in whatever place you came from," Neah added. I could hear desperation and yearning in his voice. "I asked him about 'that place' before, but he never says anything about it."

Neah was certainly intelligent, to think of such a thing from hearing me speak a handful of times. Either that, or he was very foolish. Or too curious. I hoped it was the latter, because if it was…I could kidnap him now without him even knowing it.

"I came from a place very far away," I said softly, schooling my voice to take the quality of a story teller. "This place is city carved deep in the caverns of a lone rock in the middle of the desert. It is an ancient place found abandoned by my ancestors. The perfect fortress from attack, and the perfect shelter from the heat of the unforgiving sun."

I knew Neah was listening to every word. He had leaned closer to me unconsciously and I found myself shifting away from him. He was so clean and untainted compared to me. I could not bring myself to even touch him.

"This place is far?" he asked.

"It is far," I confirmed. "But the people of the desert know a shortcut."

"Tell me," said Neah eagerly. I gave him a soft smile.

"I can do better than tell you. I can show you," I told him. "It would take no more than a few minutes to travel there, and only a few hours to trace the very footsteps your brother walked."

Neah pulled away suddenly, suspiciousness aroused by my words.

"How can you possibly know who my brother is?" he asked. I chuckle.

"Walker," I replied. "You said your surname is Walker. That is a name no one in my city has. There is only one man: the infamous Mana Walker. I know much about this man, and the journey he took. I know every place he passed by, the home he stayed in."

And now Neah's attention was in my grasp again. He was so very tempted by my offer. He only needed a small push.

"Very few people would offer you this opportunity," I told him in a low voice. "We keep to ourselves and try not to mingle more than necessary in the lives of you water dwelling folk."

I could almost see him in my mind's eye, biting his lip in deliberation.

"I would get in trouble with my job, and it would worry Mana," he said slowly. Then he gave a sigh of frustration. "Alright, you can take me there. But I have one more thing I want to know before I follow you: your name."

I contemplated what I should say. I considered giving him an alias, but there was also no harm in giving him the only name I now owned.

"Call me Red."

Neah reacted to traveling through water quite well and didn't even seem to mind holding onto the sleeve of my uniform ( I still could not bring myself to allow him to touch me). He dripped water as we stepped out of the oasis's waters and I could feel the stares of many people as I broke one of the most important laws: never bring outsiders into our world. But they said nothing, for they saw my uniform and knew better than to question an Exorcist.

"I recognize the faces of some of these merchants," Neah murmured under his breath as we finally stepped onto semi-solid ground. I could hear his unsteady feet working through the sand.

"We cannot survive without your people's goods," I replied.

"Why are they staring at us?" he whispered, refusing to let go of my uniform now as I lead him to the rock formation looming before us. Already I could feel its shadow drawing close to us. Neah was soaking wet and could not feel the effects of the sun too much yet, but I was very aware of its oppression.

"It is illegal to bring an outsider here," I answered him honestly. I felt him stiffen. "But they will do nothing as long as I am here. I am, you could say, similar to the law."

It was a loose truth. The Cardinals were the law, and Exorcists their faithful mutts. It was not all a lie. Just a stretch of the truth.

"And that huge mountain we are walking towards?" he wanted to know. We passed into the shade, and for the first time I allowed myself a smile.

"This is the entrance to my world," I answered. Neah shivered to himself, and we walked together. He seemed impressed by the entrance, marveling in the natural formation of the tunnel. Of course there were many split-offs that led to nowhere and I warned him of this despite the fact that he had no intention of leaving my side. He would occasionally reach out to touch the stalagmites and stalactites within safe reach. I had, more than once, pulled him form a treacherous puddle that went down ten feet rather than its deceptive appearance of three inches. Occasionally he would walk towards a hole without knowledge and I would be forced to pull him by the lapel of his jacket. Somehow I managed to keep him safe and in one piece without even touching him. Even when he started shivering because of the cooler temperatures and the wet clothes, I simply resolved it by giving him my uniform coat. He took it without question.

"So this is the path Mana took?" Neah asked after a while. We had been walking for maybe twenty minutes and in a few turns we would reach the bridge that led to the Vatican.

"Yes. It is the path all must take if they travel into the city," I reply. "Water travel can only work in great bodies of water, and there are none that large here. You are walking in much the same footsteps your brother did."

A few minutes later, as we reached the end of the tunnel, I felt Neah stop in his tracks and gasp. I too halted, turning to him. I could sense the awe and pure amazement rolling off of him in waves.

"This is your city?" he whispered, as if his voice had suddenly lost its strength. I briefly wondered what the Vatican looked like from afar. I had only seen it from the Ark and from the lowest tier. It was pretty, but maybe from afar, it was even better.

"Indeed," I told him. He let out a breathless laugh.

"It is absolutely beautiful. This bridge is the only thing leading to it?"

I nodded.

"There is no other way to reach the city. On all sides below the city, there is only the Abyss. One slip off of the edge and you will die," I informed him. Neah did not seem at all perturbed by this.

"It looks like an island of light floating in a sea of darkness," he told me. "Like a tiered beacon. Does it reach to the top of the roof?"

"Yes. There is a staircase that connects the city with the Sky Above," I told him. Before he could question me further, I continued. "This place is called The Vatican. It is my home. And I will now take you through the very same path Mana used to go to his home here."

And just like that Neah was willingly following me across the bridge. I could tell he did not like that part too much (most people found it eerie to be walking across a thin stretch of stone lit at short increments surrounded by a sea of darkness). It did not bother me, for I knew this path like the back of my hand and needed no sight to aid me.

When we reached the city itself, there was The Main Road, and it led directly to each district without walking through the uglier parts. But as soon as we reached the first path off, I walked into the lowest level of the city. I felt Neah follow me and sensed his uneasiness.

"Where are we going?" he asked in a low voice.

"The path Mana took," I answered. "He has visited every part of this city, including the worst. This here belongs to the Black, the condemned. It is made up of convicts and monsters who have received exile. They have no fuel to burn a fire. Some adapt to the dark, and have coloring like me."

"This is where you are from?" Neah asked softly. I did not answer. We walked in silence. He could see nothing in the absolute darkness, but I knew what lurked there. People who longed to attack us and take what valuables we had. They wanted food, they wanted money to buy food. None of them dared to come near us, for once again my uniform protected us. Despite it being wrapped around Neah, they immediately recognized me as the true threat and left us alone.

"There is no one here," he whispered to me. "Agh, why am I glowing?!"

I ignored the exclamation. All Noahs glowed in the dark. They are the special few whose spark and flame can be seen glowing from within their bodies. A beacon in the darkness, so to speak.

"You are wrong, Neah. The people are merely hiding in the shadows. They are watching us. They surround us."

I felt Neah push against me. I stiffened at the contact and force myself not to react. He was not touching me yet; our flesh had not yet met.

"I want to leave this place. It frightens me," Neah admitted in a low voice. "Was Mana ever frightened here?"

"No," I answered truthfully. "He was kind and looked at us with pity. He would help the people here by giving us pieces of bread our even fruit. He saw us differently than everyone else here did. He saw us as people rather than wraiths."

I turned upon a familiar street that led upward. Now we passed into the rude homes that carried small candles for flam and warm made from their own hair, or the hair found from corpses. Clothes too.

"This is a little more prosperous. The people are still very poor, but you do not need to worry about being eaten by one of them, or attacked," I told him. He seemed to be much more nervous than before. I continued to lead him through the city, telling him about the places he was in and about Mana. Soon I found myself falling into a comfortable step with him and easily conversed with him. For a long while I forget that I was 'Red', an assassin of sorts. A loyal dog bound to Leverrier by Innocence. Being around the Noahs has always done that to me, and it seemed Neah was no exception. But when we approached the dreaded Temple, I found Red returned to me as if he were a defense mechanism. Neah had returned my uniform to me a while ago, and the priests admitted me in with great reluctance when I asked an audience with the Akuma. They could not say no, and for this one thing I was glad to be an Exorcist for.

"Are you really a simple law enforcer?" Neah whispered to me as I was lead to the Level Four Akuma's chamber.

"I never said that I was. I only likened it. But you will learn more," I promised him, placing a mask on my face now that I was reaching a place where it was needed.

The Akuma accepted us graciously, dismissing the priest. But then he turned to me with great displeasure.

"State your business, Exorcist, so that we may be done with each other. I do not like mingling with your ilk," he told me in a coarse tone. Neah was appalled by this reaction to my presence. He had seen the various looks given to me by the citizens but had dismissed it to people who hated the law.

"The feeling is mutual," I replied, feeling mildly rebellious. He had erased me after all. "Summon one of the Noahs here. Tell them I have guest for them here."

"You cannot—"

"Call them," I ordered, voice booming with a power I rarely used. It silenced the priest and he reluctantly closed his eyes and sent a mental word to them. Once he was down, he stood from his pillow on the floor and walked to a thick tome of paper where names were recorded. My stomach clenched as I recalled my own name had once been in there.

"No person can pass here if they do not carry or give their name," the Level Four Akuma told us. "Allow me to record it here and now."

I knew that if he learned of Neah's relation to Mana, he would do away with him as quickly as he had done away with me. He would not even heed my warnings and more than likely use old magic that should never be used in this day and age.

"Say nothing," I told Neah. He nodded wordlessly, I could feel his entire body move from the vigor of the motion. We waited in the irritated presence of the Akuma until at last there was the familiar sound of stone scraping stone, proof that a Noah had indeed come down to see me.

"This is the end of Mana's journey," I whispered to Neah. "He returned here every day, going up those stairs. You only need to follow this person."

I wondered who would come. Road? Jasdevi? Wisely? I hoped it wasn't Wisely. Just in case, I erected my mental barriers to prevent him from reading my mind.

"For what reason have I been summoned?" asked a smooth, warm, familiar voice. My heart softened.

"Joido, this Exorcist claimed he had a guest for the Noahs and refused to give the name of his guest," the Akuma explained. I wouldn't be surprised if it was bowing to Tyki in an attempt to grovel.

"Exorcist, who do you have with you?" Tyki asked me in a pleasant and curious voice. His sharp eyes had not yet caught the glow beneath Neah's skin, and h had also not recognized. Well, it had been years, and those years had taken a toll on me.

"This is Neah Walker, the brother of Mana Walker," I replied. "I believe he is the solution to your problem."

Neah pulled away from me slightly.

"What do you mean solution?" he asked in confusion. He became a little more fearful when I did not reply. Tyki must have noticed that spark then, for he began to approach us. Neah moved closer to me as if he thought I would protect him. "What are you doing? Stay away from me!"

I pulled myself away from Neah and allowed Tyki to take him by the arm.

"Wait, Red, what is going on?" Neah's voice was now completely filled with fear. "You told me you would take me where Mana went! What is going to happen to me? Why did you lie?"

"You'll learn soon enough," I told him, turning to leave. I had another person to fetch.

"W-Wait!" he yelped as Tyki must have forced him into a grip or lock of some sort. "Let me go! Red!"

It hurt me more than it should have to ignore those frightened screams. I could hear his fear. Confusion. Betrayal.

"Red!" he screamed desperately as if he thought I would save him. Beneath his voice I could hear Tyki whispering soft words and reassurances.

"You will become a Noah, better than the filth like that boy. And we take care of our own," he promised in a voice full of care. "We will never forgive anyone who hurts you, and we will protect you."

I remember a similar promise he had made to me. For Neah's sake I hoped he would keep it. Even though those words gave me am awful feeling of foreboding.

**I am done with this chapter T T**

**My wrist hurts now. I don't know if any of you figured out he was blind. The original character of this story had his eyes burned out with acid, but I figured it would not work as well in a DGM fanfic. Anyways, this is not a NeahXAllen fic. I don't mind that pairing, but Allen sees Neah as family more than anything else. He wants to protect Neah. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please feel free to review (that really means **_**please review**_**)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry for such long wait. I wanted to finish **_**The Tempest**_**, and then had to establish the next series I will be working on (I still have to do that last part, I only posted the prequel to it because really, it has no plot whatsoever. **

**Chapter 5**

_Red's POV_

I found Mana's residence, the man himself inside of it. I had originally thought to leave him a note posted to his door or a letter delivered to him by a third party. By now, however, I knew he must be frightened by his brother's lack of return. It had been several hours since I had spirited away Neah, several hours since Neah was supposed to have come back home. I knew that Mana would not look for him just yet. Only when the morning sun arose and he knew for sure that he could leave his vigil would he begin to look for his brother. Because there would always be the chance that Neah had simply taken a few more hours of work, or stopped somewhere with a friend. I did not want him to wait in such suspense, for not knowing is often the worst thing. Especially for a parent—and in this family Mana did play the role of a parent for Neah. For this reason I found myself walking to that little dwelling, clinging to the shadows so that no citizen would see me walking around. I had been more willing to in the daylight because I had not expected to kidnap someone and being seen would not have mattered. But now it did.

I came to Mana's door, taking in a calm breath. Briefly I wondered if he would recognize, but I knew that –like Tyki—it would not happen. Allen was a young child, full of life, rudeness, and a rebellious personality. I am Red who instead invokes darkness, lack of personality, and even cruelty when demand calls for it. Allen was always seen as a wounded child. I am seen as the heartless dog of the Cardinals. I shook my head, brushing away these poisonous thoughts and knock upon the door roughly with my knuckles. I hear the shuffle of someone, their feet scuffling against the ground, and footsteps eagerly walking to greet me. The lock clicked, and I could nearly taste Mana's eagerness and his hope.

"Are you here—" he broke off, probably the moment he laid eyes upon me. He was stunned into silence and for a moment floundered about to organize his thoughts. "You are from the Vatican."

There was no mistaking the darkness nor hostility in his tone. I could hear the sound of his nails biting into the wood of the door as his fingers clenched tightly in anger.

"Yes sir. I am an Exorcist who was assigned a mission to bring you back to the Sky Above," I answered simply and formally. I made sure to use the proper term for the home of the Noahs; no outsider would know that it was called the Ark, and it would make him more suspicious of me than he already was.

"Did Lulubell send you?" he growled at me. He was now glaring at me, the heat of his eyes burning me with the intensity. As a child I had only ever received his gentle words and kind gestures, but here I knew that he was a Noah. Danger, hostility, the will to kill. All of these things rolled off of him in waves. My instincts screamed at me, telling me that this man could slay me right where I stand without having to do more than think it or imagine the method. _That_ is how dangerous a Noah is and if one shows you this side it means that they are either very angry at you or they hate you. In this case, I deduced both.

"I only take the orders of my master," I lied. Obviously it was a partial truth, but there were times when I did everything in my power to work around the laws of command. And I wanted it to be implied that my master told me nothing of the people who request my services. The less I conversed with Mana, the better off we both would be. He would never learn anything beyond my existence as Red, and I would be able to part without fear of reverting to the person I once was.

"Please, Master Noah, follow me. Your brother is waiting for you at the Vatican. As are the other members of your family," I told him. He stiffened, sucking in a sharp breath. A moment had scarcely passed when I found myself being hauled onto the tips of my toes by the lapels of my uniform. He was suddenly much closer to me and I nearly lost my composure when I felt his clenched fists brush against my throat. It seemed so strange, that thing called human contact. And it felt even stranger coming from him because he held none of the same associations other people I touched had. This was Mana. Mana was my father. My father was touching me. He was here, now. And it hurt me deeply, the organ called a heart twisting and stirring awake as new stimulus came. How cruel fate can be, that it must stir awake the heart I sought to silence, that it would turn me human when the world I lived in broke humans. Hell, I had already broken, why must I break again?

"How dare you!" he hissed into my face. "How dare you lay a hand on Neah!"

"He is quite safe," I replied. "The other Noahs are attending to him, and I have not harmed him in any way."

These words did not placate Mana in any way. Furthermore, I knew that Neah would probably not be 'fine'. I knew very little about the process of becoming a Noah. What I did know was that it was a long, exhausting, and excruciating process. Undoubtedly Mana knew this too, and he would never want Neah to go through something so awful.

"Do you know what you have done?" he demanded, giving a sharp jerk. I did not answer. "You have ruined our lives! Does that mean nothing to you?"

Of course it did. I loved Mana and wanted to be happy. I began to love Neah as well, and wished that I did not have to betray him. Their peace and the sounds of their laughter are things that even a killer as cold as Leverrier could appreciate.

"No," I lied simply. "I am merely a tool to be used, so why would 'life' ever mean anything to me?"

Even Kanda would be disappointed in the way I presented that statement. He would be absolutely pissed off.

Mana let go of me.

"I will make you pay, you heartless bastard."

Who knew Mana could swear?

"unfortunately there is a long line of people who also want me to pay for the crimes I have committed," I told him, truly honest this time. "You will have to wait until the afterlife."

"I am immortal, you imbecile. I will never see you there."

Ah, I had forgotten about that. A Noah is the reincarnation of a soul, and every time he dies he is reborn with a seemingly new personality; that is the way a Noah matures. Us mortals however, are all sent to the same place. There, the murdered can torment their murderers for all eternity. They payback their grief and pain ten fold. And I had harmed so many in this short life of mine. Already the boundaries between reality and my eternal damnation blur, for their faces already haunt me in the hours where I am at my weakest. The only salvation is to gain their forgiveness or to live forever. I will never obtain either of those paths.

::

Mana led the way, and it left me alone to my thoughts of turmoil. There was certainly something nostalgic about it all. His grief of having lost his brother, him guiding me through the dark streets of the Vatican. It brought to mind 'what if' and 'I wish'. To this day I still do not understand Mana's motivations. He missed Neah, I understood that. But he could have taken me with him and there could have been more happiness to go around. He could have left guardianship with the Noahs. It made no sense why he would go through all of the efforts of picking up an orphan from the streets only to cast him aside after a while. The Noahs told me that he loved me and did not hate me. His actions spoke otherwise. So far, I have only been able to determine that Mana acted as he did out of loneliness. I replaced Neah, or rather he tried to use me to fill the gaping hole left from Neah's absence. Since I never fully filled it he became more and more distant, longing for the missing part of his heart. Eventually he simply left, cutting all ties with me. And I could not bring myself to blame him, for as much as I loved him, do love him, I have never been a polite nor grateful child. All I ever returned to him was the defense I kept in the fear he would see my weaknesses. Even now I cannot help if he ever loved me. Certainly there would be signs.

"_They do not like me and I do not like them," I declared, crossing my arms over my chest. Mana laughed at me and he continued working on a bracelet he was making out of leather. He often refused to do his duty as a Noah (not that there were many to do anyways) and he held hours upon hours of free time every day. Usually he would spend them playing with me, teaching me things, or he would simply spend time with me. I never would admit it, but those moments made me feel happy, and very nearly spoiled. However a week ago he returned with leather strips and cords and began weaving and carving into it with a skill I loved to watch. I knew he was making it for me because it was quite small and the details he put into it were thoughtful, done with care and love. I had never received a gift before—Mana told me that clothes and food and education did not count as gifts. This bracelet would be my very first gift and I could not wait until I received it!_

"_You simply have not shown your good side to any of the Noahs. I am sure that they will love you once they get to know you," Mana promised. "They often respond in kind, so if you give them hostility, they will return hostility."_

_I glared at him. "Are you an idiot? What good side could I possibly have that they would like? I am not a good child: I am mean, ill-tempered, and disrespectful. Who would like me?"_

_Mana paused in his work, sighing. He looked thoughtful and completely serious. _

"_I wonder," he mused. I was silent then, disappointed by his answer. Did he not like me then?_

Yes, there certainly had been signs that perhaps he did not love me after all.

"_Mana, are you done with the bracelet?" I asked gruffly, trying to hide the eagerness and excitement in my voice, feigning disinterest. Mana set it on top of his desk, massaging his tired fingers, cramped for all of the detailed carving he put into the leather._

"_Yes. It looks good, does it not?" he asked. His eyes glowed with pleasure and pride. Warmth filled his gaze, the kind I had seen when he looked into the distance. Love would be there, and sadness too._

"_It is alright," I replied vaguely. The bracelet was in fact magnificent. He was indeed very skilled with this craft. It made me feel even more loved to know that he had put so much work and effort into the small trinket. No one had ever done something like that—_

"_I made it for my brother," he informed me, still so very pleased with his work. _

_-me. No one had ever done something like that for me._

"_You…have a brother?" I asked numbly._

"_Ah, I never told you about him, have I? He is sweet, the most precious thing in the world." As he spoke of Neah Walker I saw all of the emotions he had when he stared into nothingness, when he was not looking at me: adoration, joy, love. _

And Mana continued making those special bracelets of his. He made one for each member of the Noah family, even for the members he did not like. Every time he took a new strip of leather and began to etch his emotions into it I would try to guess who it was for. I soon realized that none of them were for me. The days passed by and he grew more and more distant when those days turned into months. The strange thing was it was only me he treated differently, not the Noahs. I think I knew then that he was planning to leave. I just never wanted to believe it.

_Mana tucked me into bed as he did every night. He read me a story, made sure I was full and comfortable. But his heart was not in his actions and his mind most certainly was elsewhere. Briefly I wondered what he would do if I had been a better child—my gut told me that this was the night where he would abandon me, forsake me. Maybe if I smiled more he would never have become like this._

"_Mana?"The sound of my voice brought him to reality once more. "Why did you adopt me?"_

_He looked taken aback by the question._

"_Well…" he began, frowning as no words seemed to enter his mind. "I suppose you could say fate made me do it."_

"_Fate?" I questioned dubiously. "Fate is a load of hogwash."_

_Mana gave me a smile, the first one in weeks, full of amusement. _

"_Say what you will Allen, but it has brought me to you." He became distant again, as if recalling an old memory; and perhaps it was. "I was forced to become a Noah here and I hated it. I would have left as soon as possible, but…there was a voice…"_

_I stared at him. "You are mad."_

_He ignored me. _

"_It was a child's voice and it was constantly crying, pleading for me to help, to save him or her. The sounds were so heart wrenching that I could no longer take it. I wandered all over the Vatican searching for it, which is how I found you," he added. I could not read or understand his expression. "It continued a few months after we met, and then one day it stopped. I thought the owner died, and so I have stopped seeking it out."_

"_Surely you must have met better, more deserving waifs than me," I scoffed. Mana nodded sagely. _

"_I truly did," agreed. "None of them tried to steal my food__** and**__ accept my offer of food. You seemed the most pitiful."_

_His words stung. I wondered if he knew that and continued to do so or if he was simply too oblivious. _

__"Master Noah, you have returned," and Akuma in surprise. His voice startled me out of my thoughts. I cursed myself for having been distracted enough to forget my surroundings.

_With these Noah I can never fully control myself_, I thought irritably. I hated to think of what Kanda would do to me if he ever learned about my distraction.

"Yes and I am taking an escort with me," Mana declared. By now the Akuma knew of his stubbornness and did not protest in the slightest. I did not quite like the idea of going to the Ark, especially given my last return from it. But I knew an orphan's name is much more easily erased than an Exorcist's so I decided that it would do very little harm in going with Mana as he seemed to want.

"State your name, family, and business," the Akuma requested—politely this time.

"Red," was all I said. I felt a dozen eyes fall upon me, asking for clarification. "My name is Red, I am an Exorcist with no family and I am here because it was Mana Walker's request."

There was silence and I could sense Mana's tension. But once more, the Akuma knew better than to pressure him.

"You may pass, Red."

The heavy stone door opened and Mana stepped forward. I followed him again, ascending up the old worn stairs that had changed my life ten long years ago. It was different now. Then he had been my possible salvation, the light in a dark world. Now he could be my destruction, the hand to crush my feeble existence.

"Who is the Cardinal you serve?" Mana asked after a while. We were very near the top of the stairs.

"Howard Link," I answered before adding as an afterthought, "and occasionally Malcolm Leverrier."

"I see. Are you really blind?"

"Yes," I answer.

"You do remarkably well navigating these steps. He did not seem to believe my claim.

"Ah, but if you cannot see then it is quite a shame," Mana said mockingly, his voice echoing in a different way as he took the last step and entered the larger cave, the Ark. I joined him on the even ground. "For the Ark is quite beautiful."

_I gasped, my breath taken away by the beauty of this place. There was open space, and a simple archway entrance at the end of this vault, this cave, this vast room. No fire lit the way but that was because it was not necessary. Plants of the dark stretched across the damp rock, different varieties that both bloomed and degrade other life. They had a myriad of colored glows: thousands of shades of blue, green, pink, red, purple, yellow, orange; it was all untamed, unkempt. _

"_What do you think?" the man named Mana asked. He sounded proud of this sight. _

"_Ain't got words," I mumbled._

I knew this garden of the Ark quite well. The Noahs never tended to it nor dissuaded their growth. In fact, these plants created a haven for them. Mana now wanted to be cruel to someone who is blind, but I already had a reply for him.

"You cannot mourn a sight that you have never seen," I replied. It was a lie, but surely he would never know that.

**And that is the end of this chapter. **


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

**Red's POV**

As we crossed into that sacred realm together once more, memories began to resurface, the very ones I had buried down deep and thought that I had forgotten forever.

"_Who is this Mana?"_

"_A human with no fire within?"_

"_He can't stay."_

"_Lulubell, I will do anything to keep him."_

It was hard for me to push them down, harder than the first time, but somehow I managed to slam the lid shut on those fragments of my old self and lock the trunk which I kept them in. Truly, only a Noah could affect me so.

"Sit," Mana ordered me, pushing me into a chair in what I knew to be the reception hall. I obeyed without resistance. "I have much to discuss with you and a _specific_ Noah."

He sat down next to me and waited. My heart thudded in my chest, excited by the nearness of one I considered to be my father. He was closer than I thought he would be, considering what I have done to him and all of the pain I have caused him. Sadly it did not last long; a gentle, shockingly maternal presence approached us. Hearing the voice that came with it surprised me because I had never attributed these traits to this particular Noah.

"I cannot say that I expected to see you here so soon," Lulubell remarked. Hearing her speak also brought to mind the fact that of all of the Noahs, she was the one that never warmed up to me. In fact, she did her best to avoid and ignore me as a child.

"So you admit to expecting me? That is strange, since I had no intention of ever returning here," Mana retorted calmly.

"Why do you not just say it out loud, Walker? Why not accuse me?"

"It is too obvious. Only you could have sent this Exorcist. He knew exactly how to reach me and how to manipulate me," Mana replied. I sensed Lulubell's smugness, her pride, and her mild confusion.

"It is true that I sent him," she admitted readily enough. "But I assure you I imparted nothing to help him—"

"None of that matters at the moment," Mana interrupted. "I only need to know what has become of my brother."

"He is unharmed, and resting after his ordeal. Becoming a Noah is no laughing matter and since he is the Fourteenth Noah, his suffering that much greater. Only twelve Noahs are supposed to be awake at a time when our Lords rest," Lulubell added. I sensed an inkling of curiosity rise in my gut, for this was a topic that had never arisen before. At least not in my presence. I knew the process of becoming a Noah was painful and exhausting, but this thing about only twelve of them being awake at a time is what confused me. Was there some sort of rule against having more than that number? And who were these 'Lords' that I had never heard about before?"

"You speak too much," Mana told her coldly. "Especially in front of these contemptuous swine who are beneath us."

Briefly I wondered when Mana had ever learned such language, for he had certainly forbade me from using it while raising me.

"Come now, my dear Thirteenth; do you really think I am a fool? This Exorcist will not tell anyone of this matter or he will find that throat of his crushed by one of our hands," she said pleasantly. "Really, Mana, it was your own foolishness. You brought him here, and are not worried that one of might kill him?"

"I do not care for this dog's life," Mana declared in a louder voice. "Just take me to my brother, and deal with this beast for ruining our lives!"

Lulubell was quiet for a moment.

"You want to use the bond of the Noahs to take revenge for your brother's fate?"

I could feel the anger boiling beneath Mana's skin.

"He ruined _my happiness_, and because of his help you were able to force this fate on my little brother. As the orchestrator of this, surely you owe me," he told her grimly.

"I cannot. He merely obeyed my wishes to bring you here and then he brought to us someone whose existence we knew not of. You did such a phenomenal job of hiding our brother, that if it were not for this Exorcist's shrewdness or luck we would never have found him. Your request is denied."

"Shrewdness or luck?" Mana muttered. "Ha! I know you gave him information about me, so do not try to deny it."

"I told him nothing," Lulubell swore. Mana then turned to me.

"Then how did you know?" he demanded angrily.

"I observed you," I said simply. "The only thing Lulubell told me about was your habit of disappearing. I knew that you would stay if you had something to tie you down. So when I learned of your brother, I took that opportunity. He was curious about you; I used that curiosity to lure him here. Really, you think too lowly of this mistress."

"You truly are a bastard," Mana spat at me.

"So my mother has told me before." The reply slipped past my lips without hesitation, as if I were talking to Kanda. Inwardly I kicked myself and wondered why I had done that. Luckily it did not seem to do much harm, if any at all. My father already hated me enough; it was impossible for that animosity to deepen any further.

"Forget about this Exorcist," Lulubell told Mana softly. "Resign yourself to living here, and cherish the fact that you still have your brother with you. All is not gone. You can still be happy."

I could sense it, that eternally burning hate. He would never, ever forgive me.

"I cannot simply do as you say," Mana said at last through gritted teeth. "But I will try to settle down here while Neah recovers. After all…we Noah can only go so long without the family."

He gave all of his attention to me.

"One wrong step Exorcist and I will make sure that your life will end painfully, in the worst way a Noah can deliver it."

I dipped my head in acknowledgement of the threat and rose from my chair.

"I will bear that in mind," I promised. Then I turned towards the direction of Lulubell's voice and bowed.

"May I have my leave?"

"You may," Lulubell granted. "Remember, Exorcist, that the Noah will have negative relations with you from here on. Should you return here, you will need to be wary. We take care of our own, even if it means sullying our hands with blood."

Did she really think that someone like me would be able to return here? The fact Mana brought me here was shocking enough, even if it was for the purpose of giving me a punishment.

::

Cardinal Link looked over my report, his friend Leverrier feigning disinterest.

"A job well done Red. I am sure we now have Lulubell on our side thanks to the success of your mission," praised Link. I heard him put the sheets of paper down. "It is truly impressive. Your history with them has certainly become a useful tool for us to utilize."

"Thank you Cardinal," I replied in an even voice. I could sense Kanda's presence behind me and his irritation.

"Yes, I think that it would be a great idea if we were to use you again. There is talk of Bookman, the great historian, asking permission to record the lives and the untold stories of the Noahs. There has been much controversy concerning this request. The Noahs are gods to the people of this city, and it would be blasphemy and sacrilegious to seek more knowledge about them." Link shifted slightly and I could feel Leverrier's eyes slowly creep toward me. This was a common occurrence; he would often pretend to be uninterested in my affairs or Link's, but then his gaze would wander onto me. I could feel him mentally stripping me. I hated Leverrier even more for his sudden scrutiny. It seemed that the older I became, the more he would try to use me in a way to amuse himself. I have thought it before and he himself does not find me attractive, but he knows the tastes of others. He had not yet approached me, but his missions had become increasingly sexual in nature. Almost as if he was putting me through yet another kind of training. He did not know it, but I would never go that far with anyone. That is one thing I can control in this life, and no one would take it from me. Should he order me to pleasure someone I would disobey. If that person raped me during the pain of disobedience then so be it. I would never willingly submit to anyone.

"And why would I be useful in this matter?" I questioned, ignoring the heated eyes tracing the outline of my body.

"If someone were to try to assassinate him before he went in then we would be troubled, and if someone tried to assassinate him afterwards, we would also be troubled. Since you provided us with only the smallest portion of information about the Noahs, Bookman would be instrumental in learning about them so that we could make more allies, powerful allies," Link explained. Inwardly I smiled. I had forgotten that they had tried to get me to tell them all of the Noahs' secrets. I knew many, not all, but a good number. I will forever and always remain loyal to them. For that reason alone I feigned ignorance of a child and gave them small things about the natures of the Noahs as they treated me: with love, kindness, disdain. Most of it was useless to them. And my precious memories remained mine. No one would know about them except for me. Well, except for me and Bookman if he indeed received permission for his request. "Needless to say you would be the perfect guide for him concerning the matters of the Noahs, you two know each other quite well, your skills are exemplary, and he also _requested_ that you be made his escort."

That gathered my attention. It was true that we knew each other well; during training Bookman came to observe all of us at work as we slaughtered each other in order to survive. At night when we would return from our exercises with bloodied and battered bodies he and his apprentice would tend to our wounds. On more than one occasion he would ask me about my past. He knew of me and of my history, but he wanted to write it down from my own view. He spent so much time studying me, until he became tired of it. So why did he ask for me? Any other Exorcist would have done well, and the knowledge he thought I had of the Noahs wasn't nearly enough to be helpful. So why?

"Tch, the fucking Moyashi's mind has been in a wasteland all day," Kanda said brusquely. His voice brought me out of my thoughts. "You should send me on that mission instead of him."

I blinked beneath the blindfold in surprise. Had I been so busy thinking that I had not heard what my master had said?

"Language," Leverrier reprimanded sharply. I remembered that this was an old argument between them. Leverrier was a strict, monstrous man. Kanda, as did all other Exorcists, hated him. If I were in Kanda's position, I would likely respond in very similar ways, despite the punishment. That man had done so much to us. It was certainly worth it. "I am sure that he is simply not busy enough, that he does not have enough things to do. A few challenging missions would fix that problem of his wandering mind. In fact, I have a few more in addition to your own, Link."

"Very well then."

I would likely be whoring myself out again, humiliating people even after death, in the worst possible ways. I hated politicians, but the way Leverrier made me deal with his own ilk made me hate him a thousand times more. We, the Exorcists, had a hundred reasons to want to kill him. We all wanted to slit his throat, see him smile through the cut. But damn the Innocence that kept us loyal to our Cardinals, and damn the man who is our true master: Leverrier. It hurts to disobey him. And if we try to hurt him…well, some never recover from the mental and physical damages of that. In fact, I knew of no one who even survived.

I have more Innocence in my body than anyone else. I never had the courage to try something like that. And now that fear is mostly gone, I find myself having no reason _to _try. As Lulubell said when I was a child: I have no fire.

"Well then, I am sure you do not need to be told who Apocryohos?" Leverrier asked. I felt myself recoil mentally at the mention of the name. One of Leverrier's allies, he was a cruel man who frightened even me, though we had never met more than a few minutes.

"I do not," I confirmed.

"Good. It just so happens that his usefulness to me has run out, and I was thinking of a brilliant way to rid myself of that low class parasite," said Leverrier. "I know he has an interest in youths , especially around your age. He also like that white hair of yours. He has told me before that he would love to taint you, so how about I give him what he wants? Hmm?"

Nausea wanted to rise in my stomach. That was another reason that I strongly disliked Apocryphos. Feared him. I was thirteen the first time he felt me up, and it was something that I had not expected to experience as an Exorcist. He made me fear that touch, so much that I swore I would never be intimate with anyone, not even to release tension and frustration.

"What is it that you want me to do?" I asked, as if his words had not bothered me.

"I want you to do this." He came over and whispered his instructions in my ear. Once he was done he leaned away. "Do you understand?"

He was certainly a sick fucker.

"I do."

"Good. Then you are dismissed. You can even take Kanda with you, since he offered to do that other mission for you."

I bowed, Kanda grunted. We both left. Once we were far enough away from them Kanda walked closer to my side and spoke in a low voice.

"Are you going to be able to complete this mission?" he asked me.

"Of course," I replied. I hated that he knew my insecurities as well as Leverrier did.

"Why have you been so distracted?" he wanted to know, as he changed the topic.

"Does it worry you?" I retorted.

"Since my master spends more time thinking of how to torment you than me, yes," Kanda answered irritably.

"Do not worry. I promise it will not interfere with the mission," I assured him.

"It better not, or I swear I will fucking haunt you for the rest of your life." Kanda grunted as he realized what he had just said. We had both heard it a thousand times before. "I mean, if I died because of your failure, you would not want another ghost floating around you."

_You are being dramatic; me failing a mission will not make you die_, I thought to myself. On a more serious note, I understood what he meant. So many that we killed swore that they would be there to punish us in the after life. A few had already began their taunts in our dreams. I certainly did not want another ghost to follow me, especially not one of my fellow Exorcists. There were enough of them.

The sound of laughter startled us both. That giggle of pure and utter joy. It reminded me of yet another memory.

_Mana laughed. He found my attempts to swim in the large pool of water amusing. I hated the idea of bathing because I had to use soap, and the suds from the soap would burn my eyes. But then I discovered that one could float in the water, and that in itself was not so bad. In fact, it was a little fun. Just a little. _

"_Allen, take deeper breaths, it will help you float better," Mana advised me. I tried doing what he suggested. In the process of trying something new I lost what little rhythm I had in my limbs. I sucked in a breath before my head slipped beneath the warm water. Slowly my body sank through the water, and the sensation was surreal. It was gentle and soft like a blanket, firm enough to resemble an embrace. A slight current tugged at me and when I opened my eyes I could see light dancing on the water. Plugging my nose like Mana had shown me, I looked up and was shocked to see a beautiful world. I could see the bath's floor and my body reflected on the surface above me, but in a way a thousand times more beautiful than a mirror._

_A shadow came over me and two hands grabbed a hold of me. They lifted me out of the water and I broke through the surface._

"_Allen! Are you okay?" Mana cried, looking me over to make sure I was not injured and that I was indeed responsive. I was so shocked that I forgot to put on my disgruntled and standoffish demeanor._

"_That was amazing! Let me do it again!" I begged. He looked at me incredulously before laughing._

"_You truly are an amazing child."_

"You did it again," Kanda informed me.

"It was the laughter," I replied. "I do not think I will encounter laughter as pure as that on my mission. There is no need to worry."

She made a doubtful sound.


End file.
